Closing the door on 2002

December 2002.


Another year is crawling to a close and as we pull ourselves away from stores open 24 hours in order to more fully celebrate a religious holiday, one thing stands above the rest, something that I'm sure we can all agree on:

There are some really bad Christmas carols out there.

Stuck in a doctor's office for a couple of hours with all-Christmas-all-the-time being piped in, I decided the following: Neil Diamond should be arrested for what he does to a good Christmas carol, with "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" standing as prime evidence; the In 'Sync carol I heard was way, way out of whack; if I would have heard one more country-western killing of "Jingle Bell Rock," I would have taken a hostage.

But we all survived and can now look back on 2002 with a forced tear in our eye. Personally, I'm ready for a new year, a new chance at things, but let's close the door on the last 12 months with these reminiscent thoughts:

2002 Event most likely to bring Utahns together in one voice: The Olympics, duh.

2002 activity most likely to bring Utahns together in two voices: Main Street Plaza. My, what an interesting sausage to watch being made. I thought it interesting that it was the shrill voices that both initiated and brought to an end the "controversy." It seems some free speech advocates took to shouting "Whores of Babylon" and other such compliments -- perhaps phrases first heard at their own weddings -- at brides and grooms near the plaza. Even ACLU-bred Rocky the Squirrel said that it was such mismanagement of vocal chords that caused him to decide that "time and place restrictions" for such behavior will probably not work. So, another idea fails due to the Wingnut Principle ("For every dozen well-thought-out arguments, there will always be one Wingnut").

I'm an advocate of the First Amendment, believe me, but even I know when to keep my mouth shut.

2002 Kudos Korner: It should not go unnoticed how well things continue to work at Salt Lake International Airport even in the wake of ever-changing post-Sept. 11 efforts to keep things "safe."

2002 quote that made me go, "Huh?": An animal rights activists said a television campaign showing talking cows in California being contented and pleased to service the dairy industry was "unrealistic." Talking cows unrealistic? Go on. She said the advertising campaign unrealistically portrayed the pain and suffering cows suffer at the hands -- pun intended -- of man.

This comment came on the heels of another such activist's assertion, coming midway in a speech I attended. She said killing domestic animals for food was cruel and unusual punishment because pigs, for example, have no understanding of an afterlife, and having no hope for an afterlife, their impending doom is even more devastating and painful for them.

I like vegetarianism. I like many aspects of what it might offer me. But tell me about how red meat clogs my veins, how vegetarian culinary habits will keep my heart ticking longer. Tell me how much less damaging to the environment and cost-effective vegetarian harvesting is compared to cattle ranching. But please don't use arguments that reside in another solar system. I can't grasp those.

2002 movie that was surprise: Changing Lanes

Most surprising meal I had in 2002: Everybody in the world has eaten there, so maybe it is no real surprise to you, no real surprise here, but I had a Spicy Sirloin Steak (medium, if you're curious) at Maddox Restaurant that was marvelous. Not a big steak eater, myself, but I was rewarded by the waitress's suggestion and found a piece of meat that matched their rolls and clam chowder.

Biggest geopolitical surprise of 2002: That we aren't at war in Iraq yet. I don't doubt that Saddam is an unbalanced jerk, but what bothers me is that George W. won't show all the evidence he claims to have. He keeps saying in speech after speech that he has evidence of the production of big, bad. So let's see it. We all have TVs. We are bright people. Show it on the big screen at the U.N. Let's see trucks moving stuff from the back of the palace in the middle of the night. Let's see night-vision photos of the inside of a powdered milk factory with Scud missiles being loaded up with plutonium or whatever.

Was the evidenced gathered illegally or something? (Is anything illegal in a war?) Will it let out secrets about how advanced our spy system is? Or is the evidence kind of wishy-washy? The more Dubya and Tony Blair scream about the evidence they have in their briefcase but wont' show, well, the more I am thankful for Colin Powell and get nervous when I see Dick Cheney.
See you next year….